cookie

it should be noted that i spent all night (yes, all night) attempting to make cookie monster cupcakes.

why, you ask?

as an i'll-see-you-in-three-months gift for little zoobie (my nineteen-month-old friend that i look after a few afternoons each week). she loves cuppycakes which shall here-to-for be called "happy-ahs" (derived from happy birthday, of course) and on top of that she is nuts for all the sesame street characters. most especially: elmo, abby, big bird (bia), and cookie (which she pronounces by simply grunting).

so yes, this one little happy-ah took me all night. hopefully, i'll get a few more turned out. but the others are downright terrifying. can you blame me? remember, i'm not particularly adept with frosting.

note: if you're confused as to why i won't see zoobie for three months it's because i'm off for some fresh-air in utah!

this is how it begins...

there are mornings that as i wake i feel a calling so strong to stretch out my toes before me. and i usually consent before my wits are fully formed to stop me.

the result is a short-lived charlie horse. and short-lived or not, it is painful.

i awoke to that. and the song eleanor rigby stuck in my head.

who knows what kind of day this will be?

breath, panic, girl-time, and ice cream.

this morning i begrudgingly got out of bed.

i trudged over the hill that now separates my apartment from the corner store.

i was halfway up the hill when i realized i wasn't breathing.

no, i don't mean i was breathing heavily.

i mean i was actually holding my breath.

you see, i am leaving new york for three months in exactly two weeks. by the time i return i'll be just about two weeks from turning twenty-five. (oh, the symmetry).

reality is setting in. and breath is leaving my body far too quickly, not to return.

i have an unenviable to-do list to conquer today:

and on and on...

these are things i could (should) have been doing all weekend.

{instead i sat in bed reading. and while sitting in bed reading is the most noble and glorious of all past times, even it has a time and a place. its time and place being somewhere at the end of my to-do list (meaning what i should do once all other things are accomplished)}.

last night though, i paused the panic button and met up with my girlfriend (and something of a soul-mate) alisha (the girl behind the whole doppelgaenger saga) and we pranced around the lower east side, making time for ice cream.

because, let's be honest, there is always time--always--for ice cream.

i got all things bad for me, while alisha actually got fruit in hers. oh man, i will never be the girl that puts fruit in her ice cream. (at home yes, but out on the town? no way).

so (if it's your thing) make some time for ice cream on this holiday.

i will be here at my desk, in my room, meticulously checking off all the things on my never-ending-to-do-list, breathing all the while (i hope).

the post about absolutely nothing. the brain has gone.

i feel like i should have a grand story for you. some kind of recompense for my time away from this blogspot lover of mine.

nothing. i have nothing to give you.

i was spending time with my mom and aunt. but you knew that.

all i can say is that it was uneventful in the best possible way. trips to nordstrom (getting our makeup done), the christmas tree shop, bed, bath, and beyond. breakfasts in front of regis and kelly. home-cooked dinners at my aunt's house. running to get out of the rain. falling asleep on the couch at night.

oh and listening to the endless stories about their trip to morocco with a former ambassador.

needless to say, i was quite jealous, and would like to go. myself. immediately. (oh, with an ambassador in tow, if i could swing it {though seems doubtful}).

but there was not enough time. never is.

this is all to say that i am back. and that i enjoy eating out of bowls more than off of plates. and i cannot stand the sound of gum being chewed. that is all. thank you.

oops.

i don't know what day it is.

i am not even sure where i live anymore. (i've been shuttling between my aunt's house in montclair and my apartment in the city).

i didn't mean to step away from here for so long.

but between my mother's visit and preparing to depart nyc in two weeks (and not return until september 18 {euf}), i actually feel my mind slipping through my fingers.

so forgive me. please, forgive me.

right now we're squeezing in a little last mother-daughter time. we're watching the bachelorette (what's with the bad hair extensions?) though my mother is occasionally (often, actually) changing the channel because (in her own words):

it makes her uncomfortable when they toot their own horn so hard.

this is all to say, i have not disappeared. i'll be back. tomorrow, in fact. (i think. i hope).