some days things are just harder. i wish i could tell you why, but i can't. some days the girl that cuts the line at whole foods and whose silly boyfriend just stands there knowing she screwed up but instead of apologizing or pointing it out to her just gives you a king of sly/smug smile really gets your panties in a twist. and some days it's hard to untwist them. some days you cry, just a little on the subway. and you wonder why people can't begin their emails in a way that is a wee bit kinder way and you find you're really exhausted and without words and then your brother lays a piece of truth at your feet and you knows he's right and you know he says it out of love, but it's still hard to have someone else point out what you most dislike abut yourself--what you most fear.
and so it is on these days and in the days that follow that i remind myself to light a candle in the morning. to find a new song to play on repeat. to make a latte and sit and listen to the birds and slow down and give thanks for the fact that another day has come.
(and a little inspiration with which to begin the week):
Love after Love.
Anne Lamott: Becoming the Person You Were Meant to Be.
3 AM.