I had a rough day on Monday. It wasn't any one thing, it was just a sort of catch in my breath that hinted at a looming sadness--its presence both strange and familiarity. The sensation unsettled me and I found myself wanting to sleep--to not get out of bed. But not getting out of bed was not an option. So while I woke a little later than I should have, I made sure to make the bed and leave the house (and to do so on time).
I took the usual route to work and upon crossing fifth avenue I entered my usual morning coffee shop. It's not my favorite place--as long as I've been going there they seem to have no idea what I order, of if they've ever even seen my face before (they have). But yesterday one of the guys, who is relatively new, started chatting with me as he made my drink. I can't tell you what he said, but I know it required my response. I offered something up and he responded and we went back and forth like that for a minute, until the warm latte was between my hands. His kindness was met by my best attempt at it and I walked out of there feeling good--feeling okay. Feeling joy, even. Thankful for his goodness and my own.
I shared this recently, but I'm going to do it again because these words aren't yet done with me:
"The Greek word for the state of happiness is 'euphoria,' and the noun 'euphoros' means the bearer of goodness. One of the fundamental elements to finding euphoria is to be that euphoros -- bearer of goodness -- for yourself and for others. This means radical generosity, starting with yourself.
If we see ourselves as the bearers of good, wherever we go we will create an atmosphere of goodness around us, and we will spread a sense of well-being to others. We will start to do good things for ourselves without thinking about it, and we will start having good thoughts about ourselves. We will experience positive emotions and produce positive outcomes because we will be connecting to our innate goodness. And from that place we will bring it to others." Agapi Stassinopoulos
That joy comes when we are the bearer of goodness--kindness. The breeze will blow through again, but this notion of goodness, it's actionable, doable, manageable. And there is quite a lot of comfort in that.